Adaptation

...(stares at screen for 5 mins). Don't know how to start the post. Anyway, I've used this weekend quite properly and managed to do quite a number of stuff. Guess I've learnt how to cherish my bookouts?

Ytd was a long day, did a lot of stuff, but most importantly I got to insert a 5km run in between. I was honestly craving to run (yea) so around evening time changed to my gear and headed swiftly to WCP. It was a good, enjoyable 30-40mins, nice scenery and breeze, hated the fact that my loose specs kept sliding off my nose every 5 sec but overall it was ok. The best feeling was that I DID NOT FEEL ANY FATIGUE OR EXHAUSTION after the run. Yes, it was more of a jog than a run, but comparatively, taking previous runs into account, I can tell myself truthfully that my stamina has improved. Or so I hope. I feel ready to break the 10km barrier. Or even more!

Let's get into random entertainment/sports news:

Yea MAN UTD top table again!
Yea I'm gonna buy soulsilver (maybe?)
Yea Wrestlemania on Apr 1!
Yea Burn notice season 4 soon!
Yea Russell Hantz pwning Survivor!
Yea Dota is still controlling people's lives!
Yea Dota is still producing NERDS!

Ok, ignore the Dota stuff. I had to state it cos' Dota really sucks. See la, when I randomly think of Dota, it just pisses me off. Dota is the single most poisonous game in the history of all games. Dota is like Aids. You get it from other people, just like aids. And once you kena it, you cannot run away from it. It's like Aids, Drugs, Porn, whatever, you know what I mean can le. I told my bunkmates: "Guys, do you know why you don't have a girlfriend? Cos' you play Dota." Pardon my unwithheld hatred for Dota, but really, Dota is crap. Total and utter crap that is gonna ruin Gen Y if things continue like that.

NO OFFENSE GUYS, I KNOW A LOT OF MY BUDDIES PLAY DOTA. NOT SHOOTING AT YOU OR WHAT. IF I LOSE SOME FRIENDS OVER THIS, SO BE IT. BUT I MUST BE TRVE TO MYSELF AND HAVE A SAY IN THIS.

The Angel says, Do yourself a favor, stop Dotaing
The Devil says, Do yourself a favor, DOTA!
It's your life. =)

Let's carry on with the post. Next week is gonna be the SHIT man! The only challenging activity is SOC. Then the rest no kick de. Moreover, we gonna have drill comp, rec evening, OC night, slack slack slack haha. Best of all...wait for it...wait for it...wait for it....

THURSDAY BOOKOUT!

ALL HAIL GOOD FRIDAY XDXDXDXDXD


你不是说过一起走的吗?
但你已经没办法走动.
你不是个废人
请你让我分享你的痛.

Duh. My sucky lyrics.

QOTD: An opinion is like an asshole. Everyone has one.

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Old Sky Got Eyes

Friday night, just booked out. Managed to scrap past all the week's activities and not tio any Re-stuff.

So after SDC visit on Thurs morning, we were supposed to have final SOC test. Everyone was damn nua liao la...all POP mode liao. Despite this we still had to follow the schedule so everyone in the bunk was like...emo.

Then.

It happened. The sky SUDDENLY turned from blue to a thin shade of grey. Was it just a tease, we wondered. "No way, it was too hot in the morning for that to happen now." we concurred. So we continued to psych ourselves up for the dreaded final SOC. As minutes passed, slowly but surely it was happening. By now, the sky was very obviously greyish and decorated with numerous thick and bobbly dark clouds. It was only now, that someone actually had the confidence to bravely shout, "It's going to RAIN!". Everyone turned instantly and looked out at the sky. Oh...is this a miracle? What were the odds? Had someone went OT with his praying session with god?

By any means, it was inevitable now that the viability of SOC was in serious jeopardy. Then, the stalling stopped, and the first drops of fresh salt water fell from the sky. The unimaginable finally happened. CAT 1 has arrived! SOC WAS CANCELLED!

You cannot imagine the sheer euphoria that exploded from every single on of us that afternoon. Pure bliss and happiness. It genuinely felt like justice had been served.

So basically that was the "main event" of that day, if you will. I feel like it was more like a sign of things to come. So due to the heavy rain, everyone had to stay in bunk. That meant slacking, sleeping, or just staring into space. The next day, Friday, which was today was just SLLLAAACKKK all the way man! Morning, games day practice, short AGR+soccer, then whole afternoon SLLLAAACCCKK in bunk all the way to BCCT at ard late afternoon. Boy, the few hours of sleep during that time was the best I had in BMT. Then BCCT was so relax la...30mins only. Then we finished the day with the best possible scenario...BOOKOUT! Shiok man...

2 more weeks to POP...

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The Final March

Yes, I'm actually posting on a WEDNESDAY night/THURS morning. No, not because I AWOL or ATT C la. My Company was fortunate enough to earn a one day bookout such that we can have a nice rest back home before going for SDC visit tml. It's kinda pointless to an extent, but hey, a bookout is a bookout and I ain't complaining man!

Finally Finally Finally we've completed ALL of the high key events in BMT (barring the last 24km RM). It feels so satisfying and reliving. All the danger and stress and all that crap is over. These particular three days were the SHIT man. Monday, night IPPT. Tuesday, SOC + 16km RM. Wednesday, Live HG. If this doesn't get more mindfuking, I don't know what will. At least for a recruit's life, k?

The most important thing was that I did NOT DIE from HG...people were like, what if this happen what if that happen...and you hear all the stories of how people kena severe injury or die from the explosion of the grenade...JUST HENG I THREW THAT PUNY RUBBER EXPLOSIVE OUT FROM MY HAND AND I MADE IT ALIVE. Let's see...16km was ok, will I say it's really really shack? Not really, I mean, I was able to carry on and end strongly so let's just say I'm confident of finishing 24km. "BANKAI" really works...BUT one must only use it near the finishing line...for 16km, most of us "BANKAI" on de last 3km and it really freaking pushes you all the way to the end!

Oh, and how can I forget IPPT? Well, let's just say it's bittersweet la. I earned a SILVER, but seriously I was that close to a GOLD so it's kinda heartpain. Anyway, SILVER is better than nothing, and I've proved to myself that all my hard work from a fatty until now was not wasted. However, I know, the final test will be to achieve IPPT GOLD. Only then will I have 100% transformed from FAT to FIT. My aim is to hit that target by the next 2 - 3 IPPTs.

Stats:
SBJ: 230cm (4cm more!!!)(3)
Chin ups: 11 (Just nice)(4)
Shuttle Run: 10.21 (enough for GOLD)(4)
Sit ups: 60 (my highest ever)(5)
2.4km Run: Timing not out, should be around 10 flat? (Must hit 9 min 44 sec)

Just SBJ and 2.4km...so close, yet so far, it's tearing me apart =.=

LOSE WEIGHT or GAIN MUSCLE. CHOOSE ONE!

Fk you, I choose both.

On a side note, I've finally gained some invaluable info bout' my future, but I've not come to a conclusion yet. Please let me have time to consider my best route. So ( ) help me...

For now, LAST TWO WEEKS OF BMT LEFT!!! SLACKING TIME!!! POP SOON!!! CHALET SOON!!!

Kvlt/Trve.

QOTD: Maybe?

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Recuperation Starts Now

Finally...I've completed some of the most impt events in BMT, namely Field Camp and SIT Test. Well, I think I kinda screwed up my mission, but I'm not gonna cry over it or wadever as command school is not really important to me anymore. Although I did put 'Yes' during my EI (don't really know why).

The most xiong activity this week was probably the fast marches during SIT TEST. Omg man early in the morning in SBO fast march/run is damn shack. Esp more so if you're at the freaking back. So everytime I'll push my ass all the way to the front so that I don't have to catch up and run so much. At one point I even pushed to the Platoon infront on me till the point that when we reached the gathering area I was the first and only guy in assembling in my platoon area while the others were still coming back. It's tiring to keep on overtaking people, but I think I've developed a fetish to cut the rows and stay at the front, LOL. It's like whenever I see gaps, I'll not call the guy infront the double. I'll just run and take his place. And so on. And so on. Until only my PC infront of me. That's the same for RMs. I just hate staying at the back and suffer like a dog.

Argh, talking bout' RM, next week is gonna be 16km RM!!! How to survive sia...12km already my back damn pain liao... This is sick man...enhanced batch schedules are so fast, non stop de...no time to rest...Anyone got tips how to lighten the heavy load on my back? No probs for my feet, I've plastered and powdered and double socked in all ways imaginable so that's settled. But my back no protection...so vulnerable...

Come to think of it, BMT is fking going to end! It's times like these that make me confused and stuck. It's like you don't know whether to feel sad of happy. There are so many memorable events during BMT that makes you feel a tinge of sadness that you're going to leave it. On the other hand BMT is no fun party so instinctively you'd want it to end so that you can finally get past this milestone. Less than 3 weeks left...

Now, only left with HG, 16, 24 and POP. Fast right? It was less than 10 posts before that I was lamenting and emoing over ENLISTMENT. Now everything seems like a flash and non long after, this will end and I'll be going to my new vocation. Seriously, I'm gonna miss all my commanders in Cougar. They are truly the best of the best.

On the bigger picture, I don't know how my future's gonna pan out. I seriously don't know. Those who already secured a slot in Uni, good for you. I'm not like you guys. I have to take the hard road. The road not taken. Heck, I haven't even chosen a route. Don't worry bout' me, If I live, I live to tell it. If I die, it's my life, not yours, so don't feel guilty over it.

I have some things to settle, and also need to rest my body, mind and soul, so I'll end my post here. As usual, wait for my developments next week! Thanks.

QOTD: Unterhalb, es ist unterhalb. Das verschmutzte Abteil benötigt meine Zeit.

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Withering Away...

I'm really straying away from posting now. Just don't have to feeling man. Everytime I book out time just seems so short and I just feel too shack or emo to even thing of anything. But I'll not give up this blog...yet.

I'm gonna put it short and sweet.

THIS WEEK WAS HELL.

FIELD CAMP WAS FKING SHACK.

MINDFUCK + PHYSICAL TORTURE.

SWEAT LIKE DOG.

I'll never be the same again.

LET'S INCREASE THE LEVEL!

NEXT WEEK IS SITEST!

EVEN MORE XIONG, THEY SAY!

I can only look forward to next (supposedly) long weekend...since they say got Field Camp rest. I really need it. I mean, 5 days of torture den like less than 24 hours to rest before another week of (almost) the same thing? It's fking SLAVERY man.

FKING silver lining better show yourself soon and stop hiding behind the dark clouds!

To quote:

Everything here is so cold,
Everything here is so dark.

Just 4 more days! Just tahan through...IPPT, SOC x2, 12km ROUTE MARCH OMG!!!, SITEST...
I don't know how I survived FC. I don't know if I can survive this.

There are so many problems now. I am currently in another CRISIS period in my life. I don't know when it will end, or if it will at all.

I can only take things chunk by chunk, step by step.

Somehow, being Kvlt/Trve still seems to be able to keep me alive. I am a man who can only be motivated by negativity. The more darker, deeper, more pressure, more shit thrown at me, the more pissed and motivated and focused I become. I guess it's a combi of my screwed up ideality and my temperamental personality.

So help me Lab. Drive me to my gear 5 during RM. Make me forget all the pain.

I have not tio any dumb heat rash or other common injuries that ppl tio in FC. In fact I'll still 100%, just that I'm still recovering from the fatigue. Again, primary aim this next week is still to not tio any injury and come back 100%.

So many questions, so little answers.

But the one I want to know the most is: When will my next positive event occur? It's been a string of negativity since BMT. Worsen by A levels, range, and FC.

If I had things my way, things would change for the better. NOW.

Stay tuned.

QOTD: Nothing to do, high kneel!

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Sleepy and Immortal

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING POST CONTAINS EXTREME LEVELS OF RANTING DEPICTING UNCENSORED AND UNRESTRICTED AMOUNTS OF SWEARING. READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.

Knn cb...to sum in up basically, I'm entering another rough path of my life AGAIN. This time I really fucking have to make a damn decision sooner or later. Fuck everything la. My whole life just fucking crumbled again and this time it's a combination of all the crap that is happening. In Army, my A level results, everything SUCKS. FUCK SOCIETY. FUCK THE ACADEMICS. I'M NEVER REPEATING ANY MORE JC OR WADEVER SHIT. FUCKING WASTE OF MY TIME. DON'T PIN YOUR HOPES ON ME COS' AT THE END OF THE DAY I'M NOT GONNA DELIVER NO MATTER HOW MUCH I TRY COS' I FUCKING CAN'T STUDY!!! CB....

NOW I have to fucking consider my future and start to put things into prospective. My choices now are FFFFKKING LIMITED and everything's just fucked. I guess I just have to make the best out of this fked up situation.

I HAVE WASTED A LOT OF TIME. A LOT. Haiz I really couldn't care less anyway, die jiu die lor.

THIS WEEK SUCKS AND THE FOLLOWING'S GONNA BE WORSE COS' ITS FIELD CAMP. Doesn't get any more screwed up than this, does it?




....I tried. I tried really hard.

Screw academics. Fucking middle finger salute u. UP YOURS!

These few days not much sleep at all, fucking range range range. One positive though, seeing the tracer round hit the target and exploding in a flare of red brillance was one of the most memorable images I'll ever see in my life. Other than that, screw range, screw bmt, screw A levels.

Do me a favour, don't ask for my results.

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