Giving Up.

Update: I gave up half way on my 33K run.

Stopped at 10K mark. After some thought, I guess I must have suffered from burnout. Going too far, too much, too soon. Not letting the body rest. I should have known going 33K today was impossible but I still tried. Not just physically, mentally, I was even worse. I wasn't psyched up for today at all. Zero motivation, not realising that I am fighting a beast today. Not prepared. I don't have the rage. I can't feed on negativity. Where are all the things that make me jealous? I need them so that I can fuel up! Post all your happy facebook pictures! Go into relationships and make me jealous! Do the sweetest lovey dovey things and post them on facebook and enrage me! If I don't see all these I can't be motivated to train myself!! Things just seem too good nowadays! I can't feed on anything! And circumstances did not help me either. Sleep so bloody late yesterday, woke up and it was already 10:30am. I had already lost the battle before I even started. If I am ever doing 30K + I MUST wake up at 7. Going out there at 2pm, when the Sun is blistering hot and my body is so damn sleepy, it is just not going to work out. And my damn legs feel so bloody heavy today. Even when I'm going so slow. I just lost all sense of direction, just going out and running without a sense of purpose. 

Complacency, Lack of motivation, insufficient preparation and other distractions all attributed to my failure today. 

But fret not, somehow, someway, someday, 33K will happen. 

Yea, I gave up today...so what.