2011: A Perspective from 2010

*Tries to be as positive as possible even though I'm down with a flu and need to book in tonight*

Hey! It's the final hours of 2010 and we are counting down! This year there will be no traditional gathering and countdown celebration for me as everyone is busy. We the army guys are in camp, others have love interest, etc. Indeed, I will be counting down in camp heh.

Every year eve, our NP clique will sit down quietly after countdown and have a good chat about their year and their hopes for the next. However this year it ain't happening which is quite a shame. So instead, BLOG! I will be putting my heartfelt thoughts as we share the moment together...

A look back, wow, it has been a good year. Better than 2009, if you asked me. And I thought 2009 was a great year. It just keeps getting better, I hope. But 2010 was huge. A lot of life changing events happened. I remember on 1 Jan 2010 chilling @ henderson waves thinking what would 2010 be like. And now I am thinking the same about 2011.

My motto for 2010 was "Life begins at 20". Or so it always has been. In 2010, I finally hit my twenties and it felt bittersweet. I was no longer a kid or teenager. I was no long an adolescent going through the juvenile period. The time had finally come, that I was going to face adulthood. I admit, I have had my share of wasted years in my youth, but all the more it made me want to redeem myself. So with an aim to do as much as I possibly can in 2010, I took on the year. 

Perhaps no bigger chapter in my life could top the day I took up competitive running! In 2009, I was a changed man. I underwent the biggest undertaking in my life by losing 22kg, turning from fat to fit. In 2010, I am proud to say I have maintained my weight and not just that, I have become way fitter! There were so many memories from the races I participated in. For example, my first race, the Army Half Marathon. I experienced the atmosphere and spirit of running. Or the time I went to KL for the Nike race. First overseas race! Or my first trail run at Macritchie reservoir. But undoubtedly, the cream of the crop easily; MY FIRST MARATHON! Six months of struggle and preparation. All the mixed emotions -- happiness, pain, resilience accumulated, resulting in sheer estacy when I crossed the finishing line, and earning the credentials to call myself a RUNNER. I did it man, I did it. =)

Oh haha, how could I have forgotten my enlistment into SAF? Serving the nation is an obligation for every Singaporean male and in 2010, my turn came. I remembered vividly, I was not scared, I was prepared. I had lost so much weight pretty much to dodge the extra two PTP months and trained hard for BMT. I was ready. 

BMT to me will always be filled with mostly good experiences. We were trained from day one basic military skills and culture. Stuff like shooting a real rifle, throwing a real grenade, putting on camo-cream, being tortured in field camp, the soldiers' camaraderie, regimentation etc will all be etched in my memory. However I had disappointed myself as I didn't go to command school. I thought long and hard and went looking for all the reasons why. I realised it was a combination of my poor social skills and incompetent A level grades. This led me to question my value as a human being, but it spurred me on the push harder in my running. 

I was extremely bothered, but I was lucky enough to be posted as a Military Police! It is definitely one of the best vocation out there. 8 to 5, no stay in, no SOC/VOC, no outfields, yet we get combat pay, slack life...I am privileged. I met some very good friends in basic course, and I am grateful. Then after my graduation as a certified MP, I was posted to non other than the Istana Platoon! I guess it was fate. But life here, after half a year of 'standing', is pretty good. I love the fixed schedule and funny people. Bad news is, i got into trouble time and time again, and as of 2010 my 'record' is 5 off (deducted) and 3 extra duties. (I'm sssad). But I have learnt my lesson, and one of my aims for 2011 is not to get punished anymore. 

Also, there were sad times. During my MP basic course, my bed buddy told me my tuition mate had retook her A levels, instead of going to University! I was stunned, because I could have went back to tuition since I retook also and might have another chance. But how could I have known. That hit me pretty hard. Another event during June, I went back to the Food Expo which I worked in 2009, and saw some good people..and a crush. It was good to see her again but I know, I will never have to chance. 

Events like these always make me think a lot but I always channel them positively into running. That is where I get my motivation from. I believe in this, if I want to get a girl as perfect as I can imagine, then me myself must be good enough for her, if not better than her. I must be deserving. I look down on those princess and the frog cases. 

My 'bond' with Black Metal and aggression has also subsided. Nope, I am not over the phase. Black Metal will always be in my veins and I can never erase my dark periods, but now I have no need to call upon it so much. It is because, again, due to running. I have become a more peaceful person, more hopeful, and more believing. I love to listen to smooth Burzum music and instrumentals instead of the RAW and depressing stuff now. However the ultimate point is, I know I can always have Black Metal Music as something to sympathize with no matter how dark and depressive I feel and that is TRVE!

Now, as the new year begins, let's look at some events I forsee/hope for 2011:

• BTT and FTT done
• Be CLEAR of my future. 
• My first Ultramarathon 100K, and 2 more Marathons (SD & SCSM) 
• Finishing a presentable portfolio and applying for NTU ADM 
• Do no commit anymore stupid offences in camp (Think before you do)
• My POSB A/C balance $5000 when I ORD. 
• ORD DATE: 3/12/2011 "ORD LOH!!!!!"
• Taiwan Trip?
• Wisdom tooth extraction
• First Clubbing experience
• 21st Birthday (?) (No celebration...)
• Project "Bodybuilder"?

Well, that's all I can think of now...but of course, like the past, I hope the new year brings in new surprises! I can't forsee the future, but I sure as hell have the ability to influence my own actions and choices. 9:38PM, 31 DEC 2010. I CAN STILL SAY NEXT YEAR IS 2011 YEA! I want to complete all that in 2011, when I reach 21. Life starts at 20, and I will be reaching that FIRST year on 22 Apr, and learning more things after that. Most of all, I truly, madly, deeply want to be sure of my future, and what my plans are after I ORD. I will not allow myself to still be a wandering lost soul after 21 years of life. 

Alright, HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011 EVERYBODY! LET'S ALL HAVE A GOOD ONE NEXT YEAR! (And hope it's not the last complete year in history. Cue 21,21,2010 Doomsday?)

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Seeking Solace through Adversity

Time for fun and games is over. Serious training for next year is starting on Friday and all the junk that I've been gorging will be burned off. It's finally come to and end, 2010. This year I have finally turned myself into a Runner AND Marathoner after much work. 

After the Marathon, I admit, I took it easy and threw away all discipline and motivation to train. But it allowed my body to relax and recuperate. I think that's necessary. However, I think it's about time I got sick of this lifestyle. Eating waste food consisting of empty calories and lazing around isn't my thing anymore. I need to jump back to the sane, familiar 'Runner's Path'. 

So this Friday, 31/12/2010, the last day of the year, I will be doing my last run of the year. After half a year of competitive running and a total mileage of 580 km, I will finish it up with a final 30K. I can't wait. It's been so damn long, since the marathon, that I've done a long one. My body feels good. It is taped, and more than ready. It will be a good start to the new year. 

Now, although it has been confirmed: I am doing 1st Jan, but I just have to take it. Jan's duty schedule is out, and like I said, my guard duty will start. Yes, things are still gloomy for now, but I can only take it one day at a time. 

Hmm, I hope I can summarize the year up in tomorrow's post (if there is one). Friday is the MPEU bowling cohesion @ West Coast and after that I will head for my run. 

Well, I'm short of time now, so allow me to finish my last duty of the year before I try to squeeze in a year end review.!

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AM Off

Weird. It was a last minute decision too. I think it's wasteful to use AM off since you have to book in again, but..

I stayed up too late and only got a few hours sleep. I am so short of time. I'm desperate. And I sure as hell do not want to go for CPFA and VRE =.=

Since I can't take off anytime soon (unless miracle happens), and I already have 3.5 off, and that I'll be doing 1st Jan, and guard duty, it's really meaningless to keep off. What if I kena minus off again? 

Speaking of which, yes, DAMN IT I kena 1st Jan. All hope is almost lost. Unless that Saviour comes through with our deal. Which is 99% unlikely to happen. Fingers crossed.

Going to camp now!

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A little Update

Forgot where I left off...yea, I was pretty stressed the past week. Figured some time off from the blog would be good. 

Nothing life changing or blog worthy stuff happened recently.. 

Well, indeed, I have gained weight again, but who cares bout' that? It's getting boring, and I'm getting bored of losing it. Just going with the flow this time guys, but fret not, I am still running. 

Clocked 6K on Christmas and 10K on boxing day. Wanted to challenge 25K on 25/12 as an Xmas themed run...but, well, it is too tough for me now. I am just doing short distances at a blistering pace to retain my speed. My endurance is kinda poor now. 

It is normal to slack off after a Marathon, especially in Dec. But the proper training for my Ultra 2011 will commence soon. 

Am still in the 'dark period'...and hopefully it ends around end of January. As long as the extras are not done, I am still..."SAD". 

All prayers for next Saturday! The first day of the new year! 1/1/2011. Nice number. Why, cos' I may be picked to mount on that day. If so I be counting down 2011 in camp which is ridiculously depressing. The bad news is, chances of me mounting are high, since I'm not on duty Christmas and Change of Guards. Damn...

If it really happens...it would really signify a bad start for 2011...and possibly a horrible next year...

Anyway, keep it positive, it's the final week of 2010! A great year! 3 more duties and HOPE I CAN CELEBRATE THE NEW YEAR IN PEACE. 

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Horrible Day! Freakin' blur..

Oh man...I gotta wake up. Today just exemplified the worst of me in more ways than one. I know my one great weakness clearly now; being very blur cock. Especially when I'm scared or nervous. I will be so self conscious and brainless that I f-up even the most simple things.

I had to book in today. Only one other platoon guy was in camp. During CPFA, both of us were on status so we went aside..then after a while, I went to cut my hair. After that, we left the barber and went to eat. Suddenly my friend asked, "Where's your jockey cap?". Oh shit, I misplaced it, I thought. I went back to the canteen to check. Not there. I hadn't a clue where I left it, so I instantly suggested going back to the barber to check. Luckily, it was there. How could I have been so ignorant. 

But my mind was wreaked by the fact I had to sign extra. It was bothering me the whole day. I just wanted to get it over with. Then I could take PM off and leave. 

So I decided to wait in the office for my PS. Wait. I didn't even bother to call, out of fear. And hoping he might forget. But no, he called instead and said he wanted to see me. So there and then, I couldn't escape already. Off I went to sign the extra. 3. First time. I am f-up. No matter how much I can excel in running. And the freakin' lame claims about a marathon changing your life. It all crap as my life is still the same, I am still so damn blur and f-up, AND THAT'S ALSO THE REASON I DID NOT GET CHOSEN FOR COMMAND SCHOOL IN THE FIRST PLACE COS' MY PEER APPRAISAL SUCKS, AND IT'S ALSO WHY I DID SO BADLY FOR MY A LEVELS EVEN THOUGH I TOOK TWICE, AND THAT'S ALSO THE BLOODY REASON MY SOCIAL NETWORK SUCKS, AND ALL THE OTHER CRAP IN MY LIFE.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFWKEFBWEKJFBEDKFBEKFBKJEWBFKJBFKJFB WEJHBADVBB;VBERAIUBVHIJBVIBVIBVE;V,LWBVKVBKVBWK;FVBKVJCBWEKFCBEKFJCBAEKCBWEUVBERIUVBRVKAREBVKERBVKEVBVADBVAEKvjBAV

KNN CB I AM OUT

I DONT CARE ANYMORE FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

I AM BREOKEN 

I AM BROKENC

JBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBCBBB

AND GUESS WHAT, THE STUPIDEST THING TT HAPPENED TODAY. I TOOK THE COMPUTER CARD NEEDED TO LOG IN THE I-NET AND PUT IT IN MY POCKET AND LEFT IN MY NO.4 PANTS. AND I WENT HOME. NORMALLY PPL USE IT AND LEAVE IT IN THE OFFICE, BUT OUT OF MY BLURNESS TODAY I UNKNOWINGLY TOOK IT AND PUT IN MY POCKET. THEN WHEN I WAS SLEEPING I GOT A CALL FROM MY SGT ASKING WHERE'S THE CARD AND TTS WHEN I REALISE I HAD PUT IT IN MY POCKET. I PANICKED AND SEARCHED FRANTICALLY IN MY HOUSE BUT IT WASN'T THERE. SO I ASKED HIM TO OPEN MY LOCKER AND SEARCH. ONLY THEN HE FOUND IT AND I GOT FKED.

I MEAN WHY THE FK YOU BRING PUT II IN YOUR POCKET AND GO FF YOU DUMB CB!!!! WHAT WAS I THINKING? NO I OBVIOUSLY WASN'T THINKING !!!!1 MY MENTAL STATE OF MIND IS IN A MESS NOW. I AM ROTTING

GO FK YOURSELF LA 

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Dark times, dark times.

December's just started. 

December's just started.

Somehow, karma never fails to hit me in the most ironical of ways. It ALWAYS happens this way. By a cruel twist of fate. My life is just like that. My stars are fixed. 

Well.

I just signed 3 extra AGAIN.

You know, there's no use elaborating about how it signed, why I signed or whatever. There's no point in letting people know since it's my blog. If people are truly concerned they will ask themselves, Lab. So leave it there. I only need to focus on how to clean this shit up. Yes, from my tone I am damn pissed just talking about it, but on doing the extra, it really doesn't bother me after a long thought. After all, it's just staying in extra hours in camp, a few hours of sleep taken away, for what, three days. It's nothing. I can handle it. But how I actually signed really pisses me off. 

Am I really the 'jinx'? I wonder. Or am I just undergoing a rough time early. Maybe this will pass soon, and the rest of my army life will be smooth sailing. After all, I do learn from past mistakes. I hope this is the case. I am sick of having my offs deducted and signing extras like free. It's killin' me man, even though I may on a brave front. 

Yet, Metal never ceases to induce some comfort and tranquility into these dark times. I can always depend on Metal to emote with, to share my negative emotions. Of course, I could go out and have a long run to clear my mind too. On the 'channeling my negative emotions' department, I am adept. No worries for me being unable to handle the stress and doing silly things, nope. 

But truth be told, I really hate this period. From my 3 days off deducted, to getting caught for wearing watch on parade, to now. I am just hanging on a thread, son. I fear another punishment will break me. 

Looking into the near future, I admit. It's bleak. And ain't gonna be over soon. Guard duty, after I sign, will only start on January. What a lovely way to start the new year, eh? And duty schedule/parade/company drill are so packed, I can't take off easily. Just for next week, I am packed from MONDAY to THURSDAY. Then come end of the year, more duties. Luckily, I don't have duty on 31. But what I'm fearing is, to get duty on 1/1/2011. That is the ultimate blow. In fact that would suck for anyone on duty. Even after 2010, 2011's gonna start negatively. Damn, I hate being so moody but this is just the shite situation I'm in now! 

And that's just camp life. There are much bigger outside stuff bothering me now...

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Am I Injured?

This ain't good man..I've fked my left again after today's run..

First, my foot...which I thought was healed. It's some kind of twitching pain that doesn't go away...I don't know whether it's the joints or bone. It's not affecting me much other than the pain. But freak, it's back again and I think I'd better stop running any time soon.

Then my freaking knee. Is it Runner's knee I don't really know. It's at the side of the kneecap and is really getting more and more painful after each run. At first it was nothing but after today's run I can really feel the burn. 

I guess I really need a break. These repetitive pounding and thrashing of my joints is not looking good for my legs now and in the future. 

Let's hope the pain subsides after my two days duty (SIBEI SIAN, WEEKEND DUTY SOMEMORE). 

It's 9.30pm already...and I don't feel like booking in at all. Zzz...

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God Damn ULCERS!

It's killin' me...every second, every minute, every DAY..! PAIN, PAIN, unadulterated PAIN that doesn't let me have a break!!!

It's the damn ULCER(S) in my mouth!!! 

I'm seriously gonna be super careful not to brush my lips again...ARGH. People take it for granted when their mouth are free of ulcers but when the damn irritant comes it hits and hurts HARD man! 

Somemore my ulcer is not one but two or three overlapping ZZZZZZZZZZZZ just imagining it makes my hair stand!!! AND! If you roll your tongue and try to feel it, you actually feel how deep the hole is *brain burstsss*!!!! HOLY CRAP...... I can't eat, I can't drink, I can't even sleep properly. And it is definitely affecting my mood so much. I feel so freaking piss-as-shit every second man!!! I get damn moody, and so easily irritable...as if I wasn't easily moody and irritable enough. Geezzzz...

Anyone who has experienced such "mega-ulcers" would know exactly how I feel.

OH man, I hate being an Ulcer-boy. 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

16 days left. Here's hoping I get some things done by the end of the year. Can't wait for New Year Eve Countdown...and NEXT YEAR!

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Nice Surprise!

Wow, I ran the Pandan Reservoir Run 2010 and didn't expect to get Second Runner-up overall! It was 6.2K, a single loop around the Reservoir. I was just looking to clock a personal best for my 5K, since I've never done that before. Little did I know that my timing was enough for a trophy! Of course, this is a small scale and little known neighbourhood event, with only maybe 200 participants, but hey, a trophy is still a trophy!

The weather was excellent. Clear skies, some breeze but not too strong. Perfect for a Sunday morning run. I have not ran since Stan Chart, so I was well rested and ready for a good performance. After the little 'oldies' workout, which was quite useful actually, we headed to the start. 

Immediately after flag off, I went clear of the crowd to check the first runners. Turned out there was only one guy breaking off -- fast, and no there was nobody going after him. I knew this was a good chance to win something, so I went catching the rabbit. As fate would have it, I was reading 'Born To Run' recently and learned a thing or two about drafting. So I stuck constantly behind the leader. Not for long though. Just when I thought this was going to be a two tail race, I heard the chasing footsteps of another runner approaching. And it was coming fast. 

Minutes later, the three of us were more or less on par. Like breaking the ice, one guy had to take the initiative to lead the pack. I was not going to do that. My strategy was clear -- stick behind the leaders all the way until the final surge. Then, the first guy slowed down drastically, and I thought he was done for. From that point, the third guy overtook the lead, and I followed, leaving the original rabbit behind.

But as my limits would bring me back to reality, I felt the blistering pace of the new leader too hot to handle! Little by little, I strayed behind, unable to keep up. He did not slow down; I just could not keep up. So it was second place then! But -- more surprises. Shortly after the halfway mark, as I was struggling the most, the original rabbit came emerging back with a bang. I saw his pace, and I knew, second was gonna be his. I was fooled; he was just tailing back to save energy before increasing pace. Great strategy. Instantly, I turned to have a look behind me. Coast clear. Yup, nobody was threatening my 3rd place. I was quite annoyed to have lost 2nd to the rabbit, but more importantly, I wanted a trophy. So I kept going, knowing that if I kept my pace my 3rd place was secured. 

It wasn't easy, as stitches struck and I had to run with it for a good 2K or so. Thankfully, a MR25 elite ran past me with encouraging words. That was a good morale booster, and I pushed on harder. I was closing the gap on the second guy, but the adrenaline didn't last for long, and I were back to normal pace again. Soon, the end point was in sight. I surged past the line, ending strongly. 3rd place!

Then, at least for a while, I felt what it was like to win a race. Straightaway, photos were taken and I was ushered to the rest area. Lots of congratulations and cheers. However, I had to wait nearly a good hour or so before prize presentation, as we needed to wait for every runner to finish. It felt great to have your name called and having so much recognition. I came in a timing of 25:20, which is ridiculously fast even for myself. That's less than a 10 minute 2.4K run, to put into perspective. BUT I SURE LOVE IT AS I AM STILL IMPROVING AND OWNING MOST OF MY PEERS!! 

                                                                         2nd Runner-up!                                                                

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Keep on Transiting...

Alright, say goodbye to the old template! This current one is close to what I had envisioned, and taking into account my lack of HTML skills, I think this should do for now. 

Life after the Marathon has resumed! I have taken a long break, didn't run since Sunday and still resting now. Well, actually I'm supposed to ain't I? 

Guess what, luck or fate has it that the Medical Officer thinks so too! So I went for a check on my foot two days ago (though mainly cos' I couldn't run and do drills), and he gave me more than I asked for -- EX L/L for TWO WEEKS, and a X-ray appointment! My left foot was indeed feeling a bit of sharp pain post-Marathon, but I've recovered from those before. So I was very surprised to get such a good excuse LOL. But still, I think I deserve the free rest after doing a freakin' Marathon man! 

It's time to really take a step back from running for now. I have some unfinished business in other departments of my life, and I intend to fix it sooner than later. My pay has finally come, and I am ready to start work. REAL WORK. But I will need every bit of lesson I learn in the past few months to spur me on, as the journey will be tough and demoralising. Slowly with progress, I will face up to my fear and reveal more...

On camp life, we are back to Istana duties all too soon. I already knew my 'Marathon Leave' would be my last one for this year, and that it will be a rough December ahead. With stuff like duties....punishments (?)...drills....parades....money problems...studies...

Whatever it is, I need to use December as a base to clean up whatever shit left undone this year. I can't afford to bring over unfinished business to the next year...so let's see, we are left ONLY 3 weeks to do it..every single day is precious. 

As the races for 2010 come to an end, I will look back at each and every single one and relief the emotions they have given me. Some good, some bad, most painful, but all are precious memories. I am fortunate to have photos as keepsake. However, I am already looking forward to NEXT YEAR. There's gonna be MORE NEW and EXCITING races, such as the Adidas KOTR and 100K. Damn sure I am going to join those I've missed out like the 100 Plus Passion and Mizuno runs. And one more thing. Damn sure I am going to earn a 4-hours Marathon. 

One year later, Lab, if you're reading this. Pat yourself at your back, because you saw the future come true, and DAMN it's gonna feel good. =D

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Humbled by the Marathon.

I figured I'd do a thorough recollection of my Marathon experience just for the record.

So I went to bed at 8.30pm sharp the night before. Had a absolutely shocking dream that ended up with me not attending the Marathon...guess I was too excited. Slept till' past 2am before waking up and packing up my stuff.
Re-visited 'Spirit of the Marathon' and David Goggins clips to pump me up. Then, changed into gear and cabbed to Orchard. When we reached, we took our time to do last minute preparation such as having an energy bar or putting some vaseline before depositing our bags. Then it was off to the starting point! By the time we walked to Ngee Ann City, the crowd was already filling in and the christmas lights were in full display. Not taking any chances to be late, we immediately made our way to the pens, took our spots, and waited.
I was excited, nervous and focused all at the same time. Only then had it hit me that I would be running at least, 4 hours non-stop! It was unnerving but I was still confident. Now it was around 4.30am, 30minutes to flag off. A while later they decided to cut off the pen barriers and merge the runners together. This was when I got an eye-opener; suddenly everyone around me rushed to get as near as possible to the start line. Well I thought the pens were designated to differentiate between the fast and slow runners, but didn't figure out that they would do away with it during the last moments before flag off. So this was how the people at the back could eventually get infront. Anyway, now everyone was warmed up and ready to go. Then the gun went off, and that marked the START OF THE MARATHON!
With a smile on my face, I told my compatriot Chunghuo 'good luck' and off I went! With the 5:50 pace in mind, I navigated away from the crowd to get some space. Around 1K into the race I saw an interesting and amusing sight; some runners were already going over to the nearby drains to pee!
So the first 10K was basically keeping pace for my targetted time. I made it to 58minutes sharp and still felt good. The plan was being executed; I was en-route to a sub-4.
Then the next part, I had to maintain 5:50 until 21K. This should be manageable, so I continued with the pace. Sometime after the 15K mark, my legs start to feel HEAVY. Like, real heavy. The worst part is, I had no explanation for it. It just came suddenly! Even right now, I am still appalled. I mean, I had prepared well, trained well, carbo-loaded, hydrated properly, had a proper breakfast. I checked everything. So I really didn't know why my legs started to feel heavy at only 15K. As the distance increase, the fatigue increased. I was still on pace though, but I was feeling the punch. But heck, I thought. If I could make it to 20K, I might just reset my engine. Then, as I crossed the 20K mark, I checked my watch which said approx 1 hour and though I was a few seconds off, sub-4 was still up for grabs. But I made one mistake.
I should have reach the 21K instead of 20K. That was the first of many breakdowns. I was instantly demoralised. It was only one kilometre, but it meant precious minutes wasted! I was looking into 4:10 finish now, though still wanting a sub-4. So I pushed forward.
But my efforts did not last long. My plan was to up the pace to 5:30/km from 21K to 32K, to make up the lost time, but it proved to be too much for me. I struggled to keep it from 21K to 23K before slowly down. I was very demoralised now, as I know sub-4 is almost impossible. But I still wanted 4:10.
Then suddenly, I broke down again. At the 25K mark, I remember. That was the first wall I hit. My pace just came crashing down to a mere trot. It was like a downward spiral, and without any warning! I just crashed and burned. The fatigue overcame me, and mentally I knew that was it. I could not go on pace anymore. Worst, I can't even salvage a 4:30 anymore. My thigh and calf muscles were so damn tight they could have exploded any moment. I reduced to a slow jog. I could only carry on with a slow jog. That moment, man, I hated it. I wanted to stop and give up. Seriously. But this was my FIRST Marathon, damn it! No way I could face anyone if I gave up! So I just sucked it up and aimed to finish. Yea, just to finish.
But that was just the start of the suffering. I honestly tell you, each and every step from 25K onwards, I was in PAIN. And no adrenaline rush could have helped. I had to run THROUGH the pain, each and every step. It was horrible. I remember 25K to 30K passing very slowly. At the 27K mark, I cramped up and I just stopped. I could not run anymore. Just couldn't lift my legs anymore. Thankfully I was at the aid station and I decided to apply muscle rub on my legs to lessen the pain. It worked perfectly! It was not a pretty sight, with white cream all over my legs and that my expensive 2XU was all covered in them, but it was working. The cooling sensation just fizzed out all the pain and I continued running. Even if I was jogging, I wanted to finish.
By now I was using all the mantras to keep myself going. Finally, at the 31K mark, we were out and into Marina. I saw the daylight again and carried on. But now I was using a walk-jog strategy. I would jog for around 2K or so, to the next water stop, drink up, take a gel or two, apply lots of muscle rub and move on. This carried on all the way till' the end. I even went to the toilet once, I remembered.
From 31K to 36K, cramping up was normal now. Pain was normal now. Yea, I just said pain was normal, what the heck. It is like they say, it's all up to your mental strength now. Do you give up and walk, or do you carry on running? I used any little bit of motivation to spur me on. The fatter guy infront of me? Catch up. The 4:45 pacer there? Follow him. The chio bu who is running fast than me? Overtake her. The beautiful backdrop, the fresh morning air, everything. I just had to keep going.
After 35K it my legs began hurting so much I had to walk again. Second wall I hit. Man, the Marathon is really, really though, I thought. That moment, I instantly regretted signing up for the 100K ultra next year. "F***, I wasted $165." I thought. This was when I was really humbled. I thought that 42K was nothing. Overrated. Overhyped. I was fit enough. No.
Oh my god NO. I truly respected the distance from that moment onwards and also, the people who had finished it.
Then the next few kilometres all the way to 40K was really slow. I think I took 40minutes for 5K there. At 37K, I remember distinctly, a volunteer who screamed, "You've already come this far, go all the way now!" I almost cried. Those words, man, that didn't just mean the distance for me. It meant the entire journey of my running life, my whole life. "I've already gone so far..." That was a pure adrenaline boost and for the first time since the start I shifted into my 10K race pace and RAN. And RAN, and RAN!
You know I'd love to tell you I carried on towards the end and managed to salvage a 4:30 but I can't. The distance, the fatigue was just too overwhelming. My legs felt heavy again and I was put in my rightful place back again to the slow jog. The short spur motivated me, and although it felt like an eternity, and know I am nearing the end now.
After a while I saw the Benjamin shears upslope from far. I saw the mass of runners slowly ascending up. As I got closer, I saw the majority walking up. "This is going to be REALLY tough." I lamented. I could have walked like the rest, but I did not want to put my training to waste. I had trained for hills. I did not want to have done hill-repeats like a fool for NOTHING. However slow I go up, I must not walk.
And I'm proud to say I never did. After the most challenging part of the Marathon, we were back to flat surface and less than 3K to go! I could smell it now, the finishing line. Nothing was going to stop me now. If I had thought of giving up, they were all gone now. I was literally chasing the finishing line. So I went, and went, and went.
Made it through a final U-turn past the F1 stop and now, the sign read "2km to go!". "Go...go..go...."
"1km to go!"
Oh yes.
OHHHH YES.
Then made a final left turn and the Esplanade Drive, the starting point of so many races welcomed us. Yes, Padang is just beside it now. A beautiful scenery for the final kilometre. There were lots and lots of supporters and cameraman now. The Sun was blistering hot, but I wasn't even bothered. "Keep going..." I told myself. I saw the start point now. Meaning the end point was very near.
Then, the final right turn and we were covering familiar grounds now. I was reminded to the long 10minute walks from the bus to Padang we had to take during security ops for NDP, and this was the route I am running now. I could visualise the end point. So I ran hard, forgetting about the cramps and the rashes and the suffering. Supporters were everywhere now.
Then, I saw the most beautiful thing in the world. the FINISHING POINT. It is indescribable man. I had just ran freaking 42 kilometres...!
The signs slowly unveiled -- "150m"..."100m"..."50m"...
I almost cried again. We just fed off the energy from the crowd. It very strong stuff man.

"YEAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" I screamed, as I ran past the line, fist clenched and arms up in the sky, victorious. I did it. I did the Marathon. I clocked at 5:04:12, but that wasn't important. I had finally done it. The best day of the year.
Here I'd sincerely like to Thank all the enthusiastic volunteers (not those bunch who were sleeping or just plain unmotivated) and especially to those supporters who were handing out sweets and bananas they brought themselves at the East Coast Park stretch. These are people who share their time and effort to make the race experience more wonderful. If possible I would like to do that one day, just to pass on the good spirit and make future runners feel as happy as I was when I recieve such acts of kindness.

Oh yea, I remember. I told myself, and some of you, I'd never do a Marathon again. Well I lied.

That was then. Now I know why. Why people do it again and again and again. One has to truly experience the Marathon itself to know just why, even when it so torturous, people come back every year to do it.

The Standard Chartered Marathon Singapore was the perfect way to end my 2010 official races! What a wonderful experience.

Now, about the Adidas Sundown Marathon and redeeming my 4 hour finish...

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Standard Chartered Marathon Singapore 2010 Review

Okay, let's get a formal review up before I post about my performance. 

This year was a first, in many ways. The course was split into three different start points for the Full/Half/10K. Of course, there were the newly introduced routes where runners got to cruise around iconic landmarks of Singapore such as Orchard, Sentosa, Singapore Flyer, Universal Studios etc. It certainly made the run more interesting and scenic. And also, a new record of 60,000 runners took part -- a good sign that the SCMS is still the pinnacle public sports event locally. 

On the Full Marathon route; I thought it was great! My words may not hold much since this is my maiden Marathon, but I definitely liked the fact that I got to see all the iconic landmarks as I run. Serves as a good distraction too! The start at Orchard Road - oh boy it was beautiful, with the Christmas lights and ornament in full display on an early morning. Continued past familiar buildings such as the Fullerton Hotel and Esplanade, before heading to Nicole Highway. There, it was all the way south to the long East Coast Park stretch. Well, needless to say, this is the part where runners start to 'drone', or keep their pace, or for people like me, hit the wall. But soon after the 31K mark we got to see the beautiful blue sky again and headed towards the Marina Reservoir. I absolutely loved the breathtaking view of Singapore's skyline at the 32K mark; for that moment you just forget about all the pain and appreciate the wonderful sight in front of you. Crossing the reservoir was a first for most runners too, including me. Then we were greeted by Marina Barrage (lucky we didn't have to run up =X), followed by Marina Bay Sands. After this...THE BENJAMIN SHEARS BRIDGE. The KILLER part of the Marathon. It was upslope all the way now, and you'd saw 80% of the runners walking. But after conquering that it was all the way back to Esplanade Drive and the final turn into Padang, the end point. 

Logistics wise, it wasn't perfect. There were pros and cons but ultimately the 2K walk to the baggage collection just created a very negative experience for runners, no matter how well organised the other areas were. Especially for Full Marathoners, who were already struggling to walk, much less have to get all the way to the F1 pit stop. The water points were sufficient, and volunteers were quick to re-fill the drinks so no complaints there. However it'd be much better if there were most volunteers/first aiders handing out muscle rubs, especially after 30K. At the most challenging part, the Benjamin Shears bridge, they actually ran out of muscle rub when that was the point most people need them. Gel/banana supplies were adequate. 

Well to add on, I strongly think it would be good to add music stations to the run. Having loud music being play will give runners a huge psychological boost and aid them towards completion of the race. I was wondering, this is an international event, why aren't there music stations throughout? It gave me a very 'dead' atmosphere at times, especially when we run through the mundane East Coast Park.

Post race collection was done smoothly, tents were well organised. This year's finisher's medal is awesome! Even though it's my first Marathon medal, I think it might well be my prettiest already! The shirt is really up to individual preference. Though I think the black colour would not do well with most runner's, especially females. 

In essence this year's SCMS was a success, especially the interesting route. Essentially it managed to do the most important thing which was to create the vibrant atmosphere and showcase the spirit of the marathon. It is something which I can only feel in a Marathon, nowhere else. 

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I'm not a Runner...

...till' I complete a Marathon.

Nuff Said.

No more time wasted, I need to sleep. I'm already behind schedule.

Key points. 

Breakfast, pee, drink alot, pee somemore, and gut it out there for 42K. I can do it...

Alright wait for my postrace review.!

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The Final Stop - Thoughts on Sunday.

As the day ends, we can conclude our preparation for the Marathon this Sunday.

I've not said this, but I was battling a nagging ache on my left leg. In fact, the truth is my body was hurting like hell for the past week, due to my last gym session and worsen by the high intensity soccer session. Yea, I admit if I could have done thing differently, I would have listened to my body and rest instead of playing through the pain. 

Well I am glad to say, the pain has subsided after days of sufficient rest and lots of muscular balm. It is still not 100%, but I will be fully healed by Sunday. I only fear that doing a Marathon straight after healing for days could lead to unwanted repercussions. Well there's no way I'm no-showing on Sunday, so be it if things turn out bad. 

Well my carbo-loading is going well. Or so I hope. If you consider the Anbiry Baburu we had at Ben Ten which was IMPOSSIBLE to finish OMG (Thanks to Mel the superman who finish like 3/4 singlehandedly). Been taking in loads of carbs, either wanted or unwanted I didn't care and gorged down litres and litres of water. It's forced, but it's necessary. Tomorrow, I will be having pasta with grilled chicken @ Astons as my final meal before the race.

Ok, drifted off to FB for a while but let's finish up the post.

FINAL MARATHON STRATEGY:

Employ negative splits strategy. 

Start the first half of the race, i.e. 1K to 21K, @ 10-20 seconds per km slower that target marathon pace. Simply put, go at 5:50 - 5:59 from 1K to 21K. 

For 21K to 32K, increase pace no matter what. I've already emphasize this, if I want to even remotely touch 4-hours, I must increase it to RMP. For sub-4, this means from 21K to 32K, or 11K, I must go at 5:40. If I go any second slower, 4-hour is a goner. It is so important in this part of the race, as my body hits the droning period from 21K onwards, and it's the best time to make up time. If we start too early @ RMP, we might burn out. If we try to go @ RMP only in the ending moments, we have to ask, can we do it? What if we hit the wall; a high possibility? So I concur to go at RMP from around 20K to 33K as the best period. 

After that, we face the inevitable 20 mile mark. Well I've done it before, and I've prepared already. So I don't see myself bonking there. If things progress as I intend, and hopefully I still have the state of mind to think properly, I will have to run the final 10K at, get this--52 minutes! *Gulps*. Yea that is intimidating and honestly I don't know if I can do it. But that is assuming we did the first 21K at 6 minute. If I do the first 21K at 5:50, things seem easier because I only have to do the last 10K at 55 minutes with change to spare. So I can only say, the last 10K is a BIG question mark, and I can only know how I will go at that moment. But the possible scenarios are; I bonk and just try to finish, I am behind time and I aim for 4:10 finish, I hit runner's high and I go at 10K pace for a while, ultimately finishing just outside 4 hrs, or the best scenario, I run a perfect Marathon and I hit 4 hrs. 

We shall see, that's all I can say. 

Still gotta wash my 2XU and drink 2 more cups of water! CYA.

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Same Plot; Time to Fight.

Let's get straight down to it.

Recieved a call from my spec this morning. Guess what? Apparently, he DID NOT KNOW I WAS ON LEAVE ON COG DAY and put me for COG. I was like, what the F***? Well, since the new protocol was to give full strength for all parades, everyone not on duty or leave must do parade. But I was clearly on freaking leave! I had taken 3-7 Dec don't know how many bloody months ago, approved, and now he says I must be recalled back for COG if there's no replacement? Like that's my F***king problem that you don't check whether I was on leave or not? How can a spec, just throw in my name without checking whether I'm on leave that day? And on my side, I had already verbally told him I was on leave on COG date. And it was even written on the office whiteboard. So it's HIS negligience he did not know or bother to check if I was on leave or not. And now he is literally giving me a big 'F*** You' in the face by saying worst come to worst I'll have no choice but to be recalled on COG day? And he claims I did not update the freaking parade state my leave when I did that already LMAO. This is to me just plain laziness on his part. There is NO WAY I am going to be recalled back and I am going by any means to make sure things GO MY WAY THIS TIME. I WILL FIGHT FOR MY LEAVE if he doesn't sort this matter out and find a DAMN replacement, and clean this shithole that he dug himself. I have nothing more to say. Seriously now I know why people hate this guy. To think I'm still ok with him until now. There's no way I'm doing COG. 

In case you don't know, COG clashes with Standard Chartered Marathon. That is WHY I'm so bloody pissed. I had taken in advance, way way advance, in fact this was the first leave I applied for because I want to make sure I could make it for the Marathon. And now last minute this SHIT, uncalled for SHIT happens?! 

Sunday, I've thought about it, is the MOST important day for 2010. It signifys the biggest challenge for my running life. It represents the holy grail, to be honest. From my noble start...the weight loss...5K, 7.5K, 10K, 15K, my races, my medals, my injuries, my long runs..EVERY SINGLE WORKOUT, EVERY SINGLE RUN, ACCUMULATES TO THIS. I have looked forward to this day for half a year. Not a single day has passed without me thinking of the Marathon; it's like an obsession. This Sunday, everything is going to come down to this Sunday.

And to have it taken away from me by a mere spec and his incompetency? 

NO WAY. NO BLOODY WAY. I TELL YOU, WORST COME TO WORST, I MUST FIGHT FOR MY LEAVE. NO. I MUST FIGHT FOR MY LIFE.!

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Why run a Marathon?

The typical question. 

Have heard it countless times, and the more you try to give a satisfying answer to the person who asks, the more frustrated you get. Face it, people who don't get it will never get it, unless they do it themselves. 

I just saw this person on Facebook minutes ago, who really annoyed me. 

He was actually scolding Standard Chartered and labeled them as "Bastards" for leaving his name out of the slot. When asked why, his response was that he did not went to collect his race pack on the spot.

Come on you dumb MOFO, if you don't bother to collect your race pack, you should very well know the consequences and that would be your disqualification in the race. And now you CB you go blame the organisers? How freaking dumb are you? He is the type of pimp/clubber/good-for-nothing who love to complain about lame shit and take the easy(AND LAZY) route instead of the tougher one. Bloody hell, who gives a shit about people like him anyway? And in the first place, those who are sincere about completing a marathon FOR THE RIGHT PURPOSES should be diligent enough to make sure they prepare well, they collect the race pack on time, they check for updates and stuff. I am not assuming, as I've heard that this particular guy is only joining the marathon for fun and for the sake of it. HOW PATHETIC, YOU AIMLESS DIMWIT. 

Well, that's just some entertainment. 

I think I've combed the entire internet looking for marathon/running videos, and seen the bulk of it. It's strong, inspiring stuff, it really is. But I've seen enough. I just wanna go on this Sunday. WHY am I running a Marathon? 

Am I doing it for fitness and health? Am I doing it for glory? Am I doing it to test my mind? Am I doing it to experience the different emotions that I'm gonna feel? Well you could say it's a bit of all of them. But mostly it would be to experience life itself. 

And sadly, that's what most people don't understand. That the Marathon is very similar to life. You start a new journey as you sign up for the run, you go through all the tough backstage unglamorous preparation that nobody credits you for, you feel the pre-race jitters and anxiety the night before, you discipline yourself to keep training, eat and sleep properly, you sacrifice time and effort, you feel obstracized when people see you as a freak for doing this crazy stuff, you feel the excitement when 60,000 runners gather at the start point, you feel the fresh morning air and thank God to be alive, you feel the adrenaline rush when you course through the road with thousands of supporters cheering for you, you feel pain and fatigue when you reach mile 20 or hills, you force yourself back up to reach the finishing line, you feel a sense of euphoria and relief as you cross the finishing line, you feel proud when you receive the finisher's medal and tee, you throw yourself into the beautiful atomosphere of the Marathon. 

And isn't Life something similar to that? 

It's not just about senseless running, over long, endless distances, people. "Why torture yourself", they ask. 

YOU are torturing your body by missing out on LIFE. 

QOTD: I couldn't believe I was there, even though I knew I would be there.

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When Everything Goes Wrong

This night Murphy's law rang loud in my head; "Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong". 

Seems like so much bad things are happening in my community nowadays.

On the national level, Singapore seems to be struck by a series of unfortunate and certainly, unnecessary events. Look, first the resurgence of gang related incidents. I may not have blogged about it but trust me, I am FURIOUS if anything, about what is going on. Senseless maniacs going around hacking people? What right do they have to do that? The false sense that the whole world belong to them? They can do anything they want? I won't place too much emotions onto this matter, but I sure know I would at least bring a few of them down with me if I happen to be attacked. 

I can't recall more prominent events but I know right now the society is just topsy turvy. 

Then much recently the North-South Korea tensions. God, how dumb can it get. You know the worst is this small matter link to the great powers and things escalate to a larger scale. Then sooner than you know Singapore gets involved in way or another...and SAF starts to activate all NSF and regulars. Hardly plausible, yes, but better prepared than not. 

So I got very, very paranoid just now. Read on HWZ reports of "fart-like and chemical" smells around parts of Singapore such as Seng Kang and AMK. Apparently started by a loud bang or explosion of some sort. Some even declared feeling sick, having irritated eyes and other conditions. Wow, I was scared pissed, because I thought at the back of my mind we were victims of an Island-wide Chemical attack. Checked CNA and they reported NEA acknowledged the smells but were still investigating what caused it. Hope it's nothing serious...

BUT SEEMS SO MUCH NEGATIVE EVENTS ARE HAPPENING NOW COMPARED TO FIVE YEARS AGO. DARK TIMES, DARK TIMES. THE END IS LOOMING...

Then on a personal side, I was hoping not to get injured before my Marathon. Two days of soccer nearly threatened my condition. I played barefoot on Saturday and due to too long without playing barefoot, I almost got blisters. And my legs ached like hell. And luckily soccer @ The Cage today (Istana cohesion) didn't injured me. Well, I have to say, it was damn fun and substituted as my HIIT! It was a better workout than a normal HIIT! But much to my dismay, my precious legs were threatened again when I went for dinner. As I was picking the inner cans of milk from the upper shelf, one of the cans accidentally dropped and crashed onto my big toe! A freaking 250ml metal can dropped from 2 metres and rammed onto my big toe! Like F-iretr-uck! why the hell am I so unlucky!!! Are the gods trying to purposely injure me so that I cannot make it for Sunday..?! ***AHHH RAGE****

But hey...let's just look forward to the good times coming ahead. Specifically from 2 Dec to 8 Dec. Nobody is going to touch me on those days, nobody. Tomorrow is simple, but may ruin my day. COG rehearsal, and whether my WO catches me. If yes, repercussions may be serious. If no, I am damn lucky and I can holiday mood liao. 

Wednesday another dangerous day, with CPFA and afternoon standing parade, where my WO may catch me again. 

LOL @ the horoscope today which is damn accurate for once: "Blah blah....Professionally, Tuesday and Wesnesday could be your toughest days."

I can't predict the future, so we shall see if I'm lucky or not. 

But come Thursday, I AM FREE BABY. Thur-Fri-Sat-Sun (SCSM)-Mon-Tue-Wed alright!!! SEVEN days of freedom plus SIAM COG, PARADE, SM PARADE.

I

CANNOT

WAIT.

*While I am editing my knee rammed against the table ARGH!!!* CAN I MAKE IT TO SUNDAY IN ONE PIECE?!

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And soon, the start/end of and Era.

Less than 6 months ago I started.

Less than 6 days later I will undergo the first test. 

This final week is crucial leading to race day. I'm ultimately scared of catching illnesses or getting injured so we're trying to be as careful as possible here. 

But how ironic I still played soccer (after a long time) yesterday and would be playing again tomorrow. How dangerous man. If people decide to play rough. 

On the marathon, there's no need to give so much hype, as least in my opinion. 

It's just that people compare results with inferior standards. Look, in Singapore, the average timing for a full marathon is SIX hours. And so completing a sub-6 is considered good. But to people who know better, SIX hours is NOTHING. If we compare to say, USA, where the average marathon timing is 4:30, it's nothing. But if someone hits 4:30 in Singapore it's considered above average. Why? Why can't people research more and see the truth? 

And on the distance. Yea sure, 42K is long. Heck, I don't even know if I'm in the position to comment, since the longest I've went is 33K. But come on, 42K is NOTHING if we want to compare against longer endurance events such as Ultras or Ironmans. Because Singapore only has what, ONE mere ultra per year. Laugh-out-loud. You look at the 50 milers, the 100 milers, the 150 milers, the 24 hours races, the multiday races out there, and you see how deprived we Singaporeans are. It's sad, but it can't be helped, since Singapore is so bloody small and running isn't the most popular of sports here. 

You see all that and you think, what is 26.2 miles? It's almost...amateurish! 

But then again, we will see if I can overcome this 'amateurish' marathon this Sunday. 

I agree, completing a marathon is nothing, some people might say. But to do it within a respectable timing, it's a different story. 

REAL WORK is going to start soon after my marathon, and we're not talking about fitness/running/sports/army anymore.

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The Four Hour Marathon

Hey...less than two weeks to the Marathon...it's time for the motivational videos, ain't it?

Well I might get too emotional right now and lose focus since we haven't really round up our final preparations. 

Yes, my final LSD 33K is done. And with that, the tapering process has already begun. Time to cut down the trainings, lower intensity by 50%, carbo-load, etc etc. And I am listening, it's always good to take the tried and proven route, especially for something as momentous as a marathon. 

On my target timing. My head says 4:30 but my heart wants a 3:59:59 or less. I wonder, when I look at the videos, how 3:30 is so easily achievable by fellow runners who look ....just plain average! It sends the message that a sub-4 marathon is actually simple, but truth is it's NOT. Well, at least to me now!

I've done all the trainings, and I'm already used to the 5.40 min/km pace required for a sub-4. Oh lord how I wish a can say I can maintain it for 42 kilometres! 

Well, the worst I can go is 6min/km, which equates to a 4:12 finish. I am probably going to keep at 5.40 - 6.00 for the first 21K, then push for 5.40 sharp for the next 10K. This is probably going to determine if I hit sub-4. At the 31K mark, if I 'bonk', then I will try to salvage a 4:30 finish. If I feel damn good, I will MAINTAIN 5.40 UNTIL 37K MARK WHEN I FACE THE BENJAMIN SHEARS BRIDGE! THERE I KNOW IF I DON'T CRAMP UP OR GIVE UP I WILL FINALLY UNLEASH MY FREAKING 10K RACE PACE UNTIL AS LONG AS POSSIBLE UNTIL I REACH THE FINISHING LINE................!

Phew. Talking about it gets me excited. 

Oh yes, bonking. I don't want to bonk. Searching and watching inspirations videos also leads to results showing unpleasant stuff such as bonking. It is scary when you think that may happen to you, but things like that can't be helped man. We can only hope for the best when race day comes. 

Check all your preparation for now on...especially enough hydration and carbo-loading...my duties are over, and I won't have duty until after SCSM. =) Predicted off starts on 2 Dec, after which will be my leave 3-7 Dec in view of the Marathon. 

The Four Hour Marathon. If I do it...WILL I do it?

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Positive, positive stuff.

FINALLY

I COMPLETED 33 KILOMETRES.

Just so much emotions right now...

I finally did it...I FINALLY BROKE THE 30K barrier AND I smashed the 'WALL'!

This is the BEST run I have ever done.

When I stopped halfway during my last attempt, a number of reasons attributed to it.

Now, the same goes, there's many reasons why I could do it today.

It was adequate rest. Sufficient preparation. Focused mindset. Hunger. All these must be present in order to complete a marathon.

Right now, I have all the confidence that I can finish it. 

A lot of positives from this run.

-> NO CRAMPS ANYWHERE. NONE. YOU KNOW WHEN PEOPLE CRAMP UP OR PULL THEIR MUSCLE AFTER SOMETIME? NONE FOR ME. FREAKING SOLID LEG MUSCLES. 

->I RAN AT BLOODY 90% OF MY RACE PACE. HOW I DID IT I DON'T KNOW. I COMPLETED WITHIN 4:30, BUT MINUS 1H OF REST TIME IT WAS 3:30. 3:30 FOR 33K, MEANING IF I RAN FOR 42K I WOULD HAVE FINISHED AT 4:27. NOW IF I PUSH TOWARDS 4:00 ON THAT DAY, I MAY ACTUALLY DO IT...

->NO BLISTER, NO NIPPLE ABRASION, NO BROKEN TOENAILS, MY ADIDAS SUPERNOVA CUSHION 7 IS STILL SO PERFECT, MY 2XU STILL SO PERFECT. 

->BUT. BUT. BUT. I KENA FREAKING RASHES AT MY 'YOU KNOW WHERE' AND WHEN I BATHED IT WAS PAINFUL LIKE HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS LIKE SOMEONE TOO A NEEDLE AND POKE POKE POKE THERE HOLY SHIT I ALMOST FAINTED FROM THE PAIN. 

->I could genuinely carry on the run; meaning at 33K I wasn't even dying or what. At 30K I could even run at 10K RACE PACE how's that biatch!

This is awesome. 

Nothing more I want to say, but two weeks left to the Marathon. 

Oh yea, crazy as it sounds, but I registered for the 100K sundown. But that will be for another day. 

Time to collect my race pack!

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Let's get this over with!

Uh, through the pain, relentless workouts, but that's the only way Lab works, and the only way I know how. 

I'm feelin' kinda jittery and hyper after the speed training. Woo~! 

Yes what they say is true, those people who run Marathons and Ultras are in one way or another screwed up in the mind. I guess I'm on the right track then...=DD

Alright, since I like breaking records so much, let's break another record! Nope, not in running this time. From tomorrow till' Sunday, I will be mounting consecutively, FOUR days in a row -- New Personal Record AHA! 

Yea you've every reason to think that I've really gone mad now. =DD

Crap aside, these four days especially the Sunday will be CRUCIAL in determining my Marathon performance now why do I say that? It's because my final LSD (33K) will be attempted next Monday, 22/11 morning. So if I treat this seriously I must do my part to make sure I rest enough, I eat enough and I do not injure myself out of nothing so that I'm 100% on Monday. 

By the way, on the Sundown Marathon. I am pretty sure I wanna join both 42K and 100K. Now you may think I'm crazy, but like I said, those who do all these long-distance running stuff must be somewhat screwed up in the mind. =DD

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Barrage virgin hits HIGH

Well I gotta admit, the group run just now with old NPCC buddies is pretty enjoyable. Clocked 14K, and finished with a hills repeat. Well sort of, if the Marina Barrage upslope is considered a "hill". But workout wise, I am on target. No wonder night running is so appealing, there's the breezy and cooling weather, the quiet surroundings, and somehow you don't lose energy as quickly. Oh, and running past the crowded Orchard Road at 10pm does motivate you, hah. Hmm, the next time I go back would probably be this Monday, if not on 5 Dec itself, so yea, looking forward to it man!

 

A preview for next year: New races! 

Two of the ones I'm participating for sure. 

1. Terry Fox Run 2011 

Distance: 10K RUN or 5K WALK. Price: $20 Adult/ $15 Youth. Venue: Big Splash. Competitive or not for the 10K, I'm not sure as it didn't state. The shirt is pretty ugly and "sponsorless", but $20 for 10K is ridiculously cheap. I want to do this. Hey guys who's on? More info: http://www.canadians.org.sg/pdf/Event_TerryFoxRun-flyer.pdf

2. Sundown Marathon 2011

Alright it's finally out! This is getting exciting =). So this time apparently they have changed things a bit. Instead of one single say event for all categories, they decided to do with the usual Full/Half/10K in one day but with the Ultra on another month! But guess what's the more exciting part? The Ultra is not 84K but a whopping 100K! Upgraded to the next level! Even sitting on my seat now, I am feeling pumped up for the event. My mind say just go for the 100K but my heart tells me to do the 100K AND 42K! Woah! Imagine if I could complete that! Uh, but it's still too early to say, so till' then I'll seek some opinion before deciding. The pricing is steep though, but...I'll just have to save up =(. Can't wait for my first Sundown! Interestingly, someone mentioned that there is no "Adidas" included in the title so could it be they've changed sponsors? Who, Asics? NB? NIKE? More info: http://www.sundownmarathon.com/newsletter/newletter_16112010.html

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Races down...the Marathon looms ahead.

How time flies, and we are already heading for the end of 2010..!!

Is it good? Is it bad?? Have I done all I can for this year? 

Well...those shall be addressed next time, but for my 'running life' at least, I should be quite satisfied. It was less than half a year ago when I actually wanted to take up running seriously...If you'd read my post back in June, you'd realise one of my running idols David Goggins ignited the spark in me to join competitive races. Looking back, we've done quite a few this year, haven't we? The Nicorette Quitters Run, Army Half Marathon, Nike City 10k races, New Balance Real Run, and the most recent Salomon X-Trail Run. 

It has been fun...the journey until now. Learning and training rigorously everyday... making mistakes here and there...planning and organising my time for both training and duties.. <---This was especially difficult and sometimes depressing, when things don't go your way, but judging from my race results, it has more or less worked out. Not to mention, sacrificing precious rest time to do things out of the norm...quietly suffering, training, completing workouts without recognition but only necessary assurance for results...trying to reach my targets and one up peers... Oh it's been quite a heck of a ride. 

As I digress, the Salomon trail run yesterday was a new experience. I know, this is NOTHING compared to actual trail running, but as somebody who has never even tried trail racing before, this is a very nice change. However, the organisation was utterly disappointing. Complaints ranged from the very obviously extrapolated distance of almost 13K instead of 12K (No wonder it felt so bloody long and the end!!), absence of distance markers, inefficient, clueless volunteers who lacked the sense of urgency ESPECIALLY AT THE DAMN BAG DEPOSIT, the senseless usage of such a narrow ONE WAY route, and more. It was lucky the threatening dark sky did not rain if not the whole event would have totally crumbled. I really liked the gathering venue though; the entrance of MacRitchie Reservoir, with its luscious, green surroundings, a large sheltered hall with toilets, water coolers, seats and even a cafe housed, is simply a perfect spot as a gathering venue for a vibrant opening to the event. As I promised, I did not go for timing. So we started out at a comfortable marathon pace, (anyway it was so crowded we won't have been able to overtake) before breaking away near the trails. The actual running was crazy and weird LOL, we were just having run chasing each other, which meant the run involved sprinting, slow jogs, fast runs and talking, yea talking...so much the opposite of all my previous runs. It was quite funny man, we were like the only ones talking so loudly yet the rest of the participants were so serious and focused. Anyway this easygoing tempo only carried on until the hills attacked us, and pretty much ended at 8K. Instinctively, the competitor in me came out and I was breaking away soon after. From this point all I can remember are hills, hills, and MORE HILLS. Yes, it was quite tough, but nothing I can't cope with. Strategically I started to "Bankai" and hum all the Army songs I know, but because it was so hard to recall the various songs that I could only keep repeating, "Training to be soldiers..." LOL! It really distracted me from the pain of climbing all the DAMN HILLS. Just. Hate. The. Hills. Then...as i was in my droning mode...the light appeared and we were back on asphalt. Guess what, more up slopes LOL mindboggling stuff man. By now I was fatigue as hell, and my pace reduced to a mere jog. Then at last, we hit the final 400m mark and there's no way I'd walk from now on. I carried on as fast as I can til' I saw the supposed finishing point and started sprinting. AHA what I joke I became! Passing the 'finishing point' I found it strange since there wasn't a huge crowd, only to realise the thing I was was actually the starting line DUH! (To my defence, they look exactly the same...) and I had already slowed down. So upon seeing the real end point I had to sprint again. Yea, dumb, I know. But wow I must say, this was the best reaction I received from a crowd. Maybe it was how ridiculously I looked when I was sprinting! 

Well so that was the race. I don't know the exact timing but I guess it's around an hour twenty minutes? Heh, overall despite the poor organisation things still turned out quite okay. This trail running stuff has made a new fan out of me. 

...And that concludes the races for this year. What lies ahead is the final event, the Full Marathon. I'd rather focus on my training now that be too psyched about it; this isn't the time yet. 

But as I said, by the end of the year I would have endured a hell of a journey. After thinking long and hard, I have decided that's all for my "racing life" and I will stop joining races, at least for the near future. And I will cut down all the trainings, the workouts, and looooooooooooooong runs. It's time to move on to the next phase of my life. Well what can I say, I had fun. And good things all come to an end. 

Just Kidding! WE HAVE ONLY JUST BEGUN, BABY! 

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The good ol' days of "ST65" are back?

Just finished a workout. Well, I have kind of forgotten about yesterday's bad patch. Sort of. Thought it would be good to add in an impromptu workout today since I did not complete yesterday. So I went out at 4:30pm, and managed to complete a 8K mile repeats plus 2K run. I'm glad to say after that refreshing workout, I have rebuilt my confidence and strengthen my tenacity as a runner. That said, I have already rescheduled a date for the 33K. This time I should learn from my past mistakes and finally do it, before it's too late. 

Ah yes, I have put my self cook plans into action. Went to get all the groceries after receiving my pay to stock up for the next 3 three weeks. Yup, I am going back to self cooking in preparation for the marathon. That is how important I view the marathon. Total, uncompromising commitment and preparation. Cut down the junk food, cut down the oily foods, the overload of useless carbs and 'empty' calories. Back to the protein dominant diet. Back to the "ST65" diet. The epic days where I struggled and starved and learnt  every thing about nutrition are back! I will never forget the process of how I cut 22kg through mainly self cooking and I am so excited to experience it again. The chicken breast...the tofu...the eggs...the veggies (YUCK)...the fruits...AH, HEAVEN. 

Alright, finally did the Flag Breaker for 72 man! Quite nervous, and some shite happened, AND I looked so idiotic being a first timer and all...but undeniably relived. That it didn't drop the Singapore Flag. And I didn't SIGN SEVEN extra or WORST. PHEW. Looking back it is true being Flag Breaker is quite simple in terms of the sequence of events BUT it is extremely high risk and low gain. You get to see the guard-of-honour in full view and have the VIPs are literally inches from you, though. 

Time for some Valkyria Chronicies 2 and back to Istana tomorrow!

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Giving Up.

Update: I gave up half way on my 33K run.

Stopped at 10K mark. After some thought, I guess I must have suffered from burnout. Going too far, too much, too soon. Not letting the body rest. I should have known going 33K today was impossible but I still tried. Not just physically, mentally, I was even worse. I wasn't psyched up for today at all. Zero motivation, not realising that I am fighting a beast today. Not prepared. I don't have the rage. I can't feed on negativity. Where are all the things that make me jealous? I need them so that I can fuel up! Post all your happy facebook pictures! Go into relationships and make me jealous! Do the sweetest lovey dovey things and post them on facebook and enrage me! If I don't see all these I can't be motivated to train myself!! Things just seem too good nowadays! I can't feed on anything! And circumstances did not help me either. Sleep so bloody late yesterday, woke up and it was already 10:30am. I had already lost the battle before I even started. If I am ever doing 30K + I MUST wake up at 7. Going out there at 2pm, when the Sun is blistering hot and my body is so damn sleepy, it is just not going to work out. And my damn legs feel so bloody heavy today. Even when I'm going so slow. I just lost all sense of direction, just going out and running without a sense of purpose. 

Complacency, Lack of motivation, insufficient preparation and other distractions all attributed to my failure today. 

But fret not, somehow, someway, someday, 33K will happen. 

Yea, I gave up today...so what. 

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The Leave-Off Combo STARTS!

Let's see...

Thur (L), Fri (Off), Sat (D), Sun (L), Mon (L), Mon (Off), Tue (PH), Wed (Off?)

Chain broken on Saturday but it's ok since I'm repaying duty. It's only one day, and I'll take it as a rest day for SALOMON X TRAIL RACE on Sunday! Yes, though I've never update much but I'm still looking forward to this. First trail run, no worries about timing or whatsoever as I just want to experience trail running. 

Following our Pre-marathon plans, tomorrow is going to be a BIG day for a LONG run. Really LONG. I am almost shitting brix thinking now...

THIRTY-THREE (33) KILOMETRES. 

*Gulps*.

Insane to the average and people who don't understand, but a necessity for runner's who are doing their final preparation for the marathon. It's like taking prelims, you know? Seriously I don't even know if I can walk the distance. Sure, I've gone long but not this long before..! 

But yea, 10K seemed impossible to me 10 months ago. 

21K seemed impossible to me 3 months ago. 

28K seemed impossible to me 10 days ago. 

However, there's something different this time. Have you heard about the legendary 30K mark? That humans can only store glycogen enough to sustain for 30K? Beyond which runners will experience such fatigue that they either can't carry on or lose control of their body, thereby "HITTING THE WALL"? 

I am going to do this. I am going to experience this. I am scared, but I am not backing out. There's no time for childish acts like giving up anymore. And failure is unacceptable. (UNLESS AND ONLY IF, IT RAINS TO THE POINT I CAN'T CARRY ON WITHOUT RISKING MY HEALTH). I am doing this man!

The route is easy, home to pioneer, pioneer to outram park interchange following the MRT tracks, to Fort Canning park, orchard, BY PAST ISTANA on purpose, before ending at City Hall Interchange and taking 51 Home. Ideally, this is what should happen. But I can't forsee any crap hindering me from completing tomorrow. 

Looking forward to the delicious CLIF Peanut Butter Energy Bar tomorrow! 

*Btw*

I may sign 3 extra duties for wearing watch during the 72 man guard-of-honour. Elaborate more next time. I keep telling myself : I-am-not-sad.

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